The role of the coach is to help manage and contain intense feelings as they arise in the process of divorce so they don’t interfere with making decisions that may impact your children for many years to come. The unique role of coach is different from that of a therapist in that a coach doesn’t delve into understanding why a person feels as they do, they simply help manage the feelings. You could look at it in the following way: a therapist is someone to whom you bring your baggage and she or he helps you open it up, unpack and decipher the contents. A divorce coach is someone to whom you bring your baggage and, without opening it, he or she helps you carefully carry it across the street.
The coach also helps deal with the personality factors that get in the way of settling the divorce – clients’ and even the attorneys’. Collaboratively trained coaches are experts in helping keep emotions and personalities from derailing the collaborative process.
Another important function coaches can provide is help with keeping lines of communication open between spouses, or creating ones where they did not exist. By modeling healthier ways of problem solving, talking and listening to one another, the coaches often prove vital to facilitate the divorcing couple’s difficult conversations, discussions and negotiations.